This past weekend, we held a going away party for one of my buds (Ruan, gonna miss you dude) at a plot in the middle of nowhere, and it was one to remember (even though most of the people that were there, can’t remember jack shit!). Sure partying is fun no matter where you end up doing it, but there are a few things that make getting wasted on a plot just a bit more awesome.


This reason may only apply to me, as my pants were around my ankles at least half the night (why the fuck, am I almost always half naked when I’m drunk?)…  Anyway; when you know you’ll be partying somewhere, with an abundance of dust and other unmentionables, you don’t need to put as much effort into your “outfit”. This means you have more time to drink, and that my friends, is always a good thing!

If you look like this, clothing is optional

Keep scrolling dude…



The clean up after a party always sucks ass, especially when you find that everything you own had been completely destroyed (probably by you). On a plot you don’t need to worry about all your shit being broken, as there is nothing to fucking break… except your legs, arms, neck etc. When it comes to partying, I’d rather break a bone or two, than find that my house had been trashed. (Bones can heal, therefore they’re not important)

Well, fuck…


Nah relax man! Another good thing about a plot is the seclusion. Unlike your neighbour at home, whose house is so close to yours that they’re probably watching you through the window right now… (Cue creepy music) the closest neighbour on a plot is at least a few hundred metres away. This means that unless they have superman-like hearing, they won’t be calling in any noise complaints to those pesky police. There is no bigger buzz kill than being shot by a “taser” I assure you.

Just ask this guy


There is something just primal about being surrounded by acacia trees, with the dancing flames of a fire or two being the only light source… That combined with a few drinks, Jack Parow lyrics blasting in the background and a few close friends around you, makes for unbelievable memories. Even my co-writer couldn’t resist, he showed up a bit hammered just at the point where I was already “A tad drunk”- Ed (I might have gone with “completely shitfaced”). Photos were taken…

The only problem with any party is always going to be the drunken photos on Facebook and Twitter the next day. (Sigh) At least I was fully clothed this time…