Otterlake Easter Festival 2015 was one of the best festivals I’ve ever been to. It had everything: orkeste, verversings, goeie mense, en baie bos-otters! Dit was een vir die braaf, en die wat wou uithak die naweek. Onder andere, was ek een van hulle.

In plaas van ‘n recollection van bands en wat als deur die dag gebeur het, gaan ek dit kort en kragtig hou. And what I saw throughout the festival… and basically just a few things that stood out for me in no particular order:

1. Those Fokken Peanuts at the Bar

If you hung out around the bar long enough, you were bound to see someone eat those devil-red peanuts and almost dying. I had ONE, one solitary damn peanut and I almost died. That thing went in my mouth, and was followed by 7 beers in 30 minutes. I couldn’t breathe, and I couldn’t find my Zambuck fast enough! Ed was mos die dom ene wat met die semi-sober-but-kind-of-drunk-vingers die peanut eers oor sy lippe gevryf het voordat hy my binne getree het. Die klein fokker het my fuctup gebrand, sonder enige gewete en sonder ‘n waarskuwing skoot. If you ate more than one of these, I assume you were the guy whose ass exploded in the bathroom.

How I felt after ONE peanut

How I felt after ONE peanut

2. The Beerpong Table

One, if not, the best drinking game in the world. A simple table provided hours of fun (except if you were kak, and played 15 minutes) from the ladies at AquaVita water. Beer and other alcoholic beverages were consumed, gingers entered the frame, balls were being held tight and spirits were high during the period of the beerpong. The table was packed each and every round. People were cheering each other on and conversations were held around it to discuss techniques, plotting and scheming on how to get one ball into a cup. It was a great initiative and all the funds went to the rhinos! Thank you to all who contributed, except the doos who took one of the glasses mid-game. You sir, are a doos!

No idea what happened here

No idea what happened here

3. Best CAMPSITE

I know how people always say that their campsite was the best – you’re all lying! This year we had one of the most unique campsites in Otterlake. We had great people around us, BraaiBoy providing cigars (sorry meneer, ek het baie gerook), Die Baas and an awesome vibe. No kak hit the fan, no fists were raised, and we were even treated to a full blown porno on Saturday evening. The two unknown people (they were driving a red Golf) were going at it hammer and thongs in their tent! Even left a hotdog on the roof of the tent – we think it was a symbolic tie. Thanks to the following people:

Shané Mc Mahon (lady): The only person in the world to just burn her kneecaps.
Christiaan Baartman: Hoeveel pote het ‘n octopus?
Tyron Long: EVERYONE saw you dancing without a shirt, and photos were taken.
Hendrik Lloyd: Jy mag maar nou slaap
– Bernard: In wie se span was jy nou weer vir 30 Seconds?
Henno Kruger: Ander Henno was amper vir die hele wereld gewys!
Camille Bredell: Jy mag nie in die swembad hare was nie!
Christo de Beer: How much energy is packed into that body?
Merle Geyer: You were a way better ref than me at Beerpong

4. Having a #jol

Festivals are all about having a moerse #jol! You can’t expect to have a #jol with a kak attitude. You find the #jol, not the other way around. Otterlake Easter Festival was a #jol and people were loving it. The #jol was going ‘till early in the morning hours, and it started where it ended. I saw people dancing, jumping up and down at the #jol like it was the end of the world. Jinne! Everyone was enjoying themselves, and a moerse thanks must go to the people who put together this great #jol – if it wasn’t for you, none of this would’ve been possible. Thanks for the Otter #jol.

5. The Artists

I kept this until the end as I didn’t watch a lot of the artists performing. I always make a solid, drunk-proof plan to see at least 90% of the acts, but end up watching 20% and hating myself afterwards. I saw the legendary (and intoxicated) Francois van Coke entertaining the Otters with his amazing set, and State Society who absolutely nailed it. The other acts that blew me away were Tuin, The Black Cat Bones, Jonathan Peyper, Avade, Feed the Wolf and Akkedis. See! I told you I didn’t get to see all of the artists I wanted to, but I think it wasn’t a complete and utter failure. Next year I’m taping or roll bolting myself in front of the stage.

Francois killing it on stage

Francois killing it on stage

6. The Venue

Serene bushveld? I didn’t believe it at first, but when I arrived (after getting lost on the way there) at the festival grounds, it was confirmed. One of the most beautiful festival venues in Gauteng. Lekker bosveld, ‘n rivier, baie kampplek en minimaal stof! Aitsa! Die bar area was ons ‘halfway house,’ en sommer later die naweek ons house geword, die uitkyk area op die stoep was befok. Jy kon al die orkeste gesien het en sommer ‘n biertjie vinnig bestel. Daar was ‘n swembad indien jy Otter wou trek, en ‘n moerse parkeer area vir die dag besoekers, al het dit bietjie vêr gevoel na die derde brannewyn special. Goeie werk mense!

Dit was een van die lekkerste feeste wat ek bygewoon het, en ek sal met liefde volgende jaar weer gaan. Net om die ander orkeste ook te sien, en sommer ‘n hele pak Oupas inpak vir die oordowende hoofpyn wat my vergesel het die Sondag oggend.

Thank you Otterlake! Stay awesome and keep the #jol alive! And a huge thank you for what you’re doing for OUR rhinos!